ARE YOU READY FOR YOUR CLOSE-UP WITH MR. DE MILLE?
“Yes! When I was a boy in Lewiston, Maine, I worked in de mill!”
-- Sheple B. de Lifshitz, father of SBD inventor
“Poor Norma, if she’d known about the SBD, she might have got and kept her man.”
--anonymous dieter, Hollywood, CA
"After all zose flights between Paris undt Vashington undt zen ze trips to Beijing undt all zose state dinners, I put on quite a few pounds until vun day mein Nency zaid to me: “Henry, you look like a f---in’ pig! If you don’t drop 50 pounds by Christmas, this blonde shicksa’s outta here faster than you can say “wiretap!”
Zo, in desperazhun, I found ze SBD undt all I can zay is zat, vell, Nency is still mein fraulein! Try it….it verks!"
-- Dr. Henry von Viretapp, Vorld Conquerer undt Imperial Conzultant
"Steal this diet!"
--Abbie von Hophmann
"Ah know that it’s possible to change your Culinary Lahf-style Orientation. Some of mah best friends in the overly-sahzed community have done so by following the SBD. No more excuses: get with the program!"
-Dr. Laura Schmutzenberger, Let's Focus on YOUR Family Institute, Wacko, Texas
"“Hey Bert.”
“Ayuh.”
“Whatcha been up to lately?”
“Been followin’ the SBD.”
“What’s that?”
“It’s the best diet I ever did try. Nevuh thought I could get to my goal from heah. But I did. Got theyah from heyah with the SBD….and you can too!”
Think I’ll try it.”
“Ayuh.”"
--Bert and I, Somewhayuh Downeast
"Before I found the SBD, I was rolling in overindulgence. I sinned in the morning, sinned at noon, I sinned in the evening. I scorned the wisdom of the ages and profaned the teachings of our fathers and mothers. My corpulence drove my wife out of our sacred bedroom. I took food out of the mouths of babes and ate it for myself. I ate my cake and had some more. I was driven by urges that made me like the beasts of the field.
Then, praise the Lord, I found the SBD….and now I am changed. Unto you I do say: Follow the SBD™"
-Reverend Jerry Atewell, Founder, the Corpulent Majority
";After I make big verk-out I always vanna eat a lot…..and I do! Then I step my scale and get shock. The next morning I start SBD until I get back to normal self….I tell you: you follow SBD, you never lose sex appeal. Da baby, Da!"
-- Ivanna Humpalott
"My Uncle Leon adored my Aunt Ruthie. He’d look at her and say, sounding much like Jimmy Durante - minus the “ha-cha-cha-cha-cha-chahhhhh” – Ruthie, I LUVYA! I know if he were with us today he’d happily say: SBD, I LUVYA!"
-- Jonathan B. de Lifshitz, Inventor, the SBD